// Sunday, March 12
Integration
"In love the paradox occurs that two beings become one and yet remain two."- Erich Fromm
you know, the first year of a relationship is always the best.
honeymoon period some people would call it.
the process of discovery, sincere earnestness and courtship.
everything is laid on the table.
candid and genuine.
but as the relationship gets older.
we take each other for granted,
reveal our true colours,
see ourselves change as time changes.
and that's when it begins -- integration.
i realised we'll integrate into each other's lives,
struggling between being yourself and being a single body with your partner.
take my parents for example,
most of their quarrels are due to their contrasting personal opinions on things.
and they each develop their own personal opinions through the different life experiences each of them has.
like for my dad, he's a successful businessman, and hence he sees things in a bigger picture and handles situations with a domineering front.
my mum, being a housewife all her life, begins to stand up for herself now that she's turning old and tries to give her two cents worth. however, in a smaller picture because of her lack of work experiences.
so that's when they differ.
they just don't understand each other,
and simply cannot agree with each other.
so how does this integration works?
this so called
marriage.
how do we deal with these ever-changing differences?
when at the end of the day, all we meant is to voice our opinions and not hurt the opposite party?
we don't mean to get into a fight.
who wants to anyway?
"Love does not begin and end the way we seem to think it does. Love is a battle, love is a war; love is a growing up."-- James Baldwinbut i guess it's just all part of growing up eh?
scripted at 11:53 PM
